Isolation and Mental Health

Does spending too much time alone in isolation lead to mental health decline? Let’s consider the case of the Russian composer Scriabin.

Scriabin’s career has a certain level of resemblance to that of Rachmaninov. Both were skilled in the art of composing and were accomplished pianists. Like Rachmaninov, his mother had been a fine pianist, and he was brought up by other female relatives in the extended family after his mother died just over a year after his birth.

Scriabin’s piano teacher in Moscow was Nikolay Zverev, who also taught Rachmaninov. Both entered the Conservatory in 1888 and both won gold medals during their time there. It was in the Conservatory that Scriabin caught the attention of the Russian millionaire publisher and philanthropist Mitrofan Belyayev. The latter began publishing Scriabin’s works and also sent him on a tour in Europe to play his own music.

In his later works Scriabin became increasingly involved in mysticism, and dabbled in Nietzschean theories, occult teachings, and philosophical ideas. He also developed the theory of synaesthesia, according to which art that appealed to all the senses would trigger a cataclysmic effect. His final work, Mysterium, was written with all these in mind. According to Scriabin, the performance was planned to last seven days in the Indian foothills of the Himalayas, beginning with bells suspended from the clouds. The universe would be shattered and humans replaced by nobler beings. To others, he seemed positively batty.

You can read more about the link between mental health and isolation from the Piano Teachers N8 website, or look up pianoWorks for Piano Lessons N8.

But it is fair to assume that spending too much time in self analysis, in what must seem like really isolationist activities such as being at the piano does push one towards mental health decline – as seen in this case. The same goes for other activities such as playing computer games, spending too much time on social media and other similar activities. In other words, get out! You may find that even when you are troubled, getting out for a walk, or just talking to people provides a temporary diversion from troubles. Or if you need to, arrange a visit with a counsellor so you can speak about your problems in strict confidence.

Finding Strength

When something bad happens you have three choices. You can either let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.

There is no question that at various points in life we will find obstaclees placed in our path. What did you expect? Did you think that life would be one smooth travellator, where once you have got on from birth, it would just be a matter of coasting along?

The above analogy highlights an important thing. Life is not smooth. Things happen. This could be a career incident – being made redundant, or being fired. Or it could be something to do with relationships – a breakup. But because life is never smooth anyway, we can’t view these occurences as the disruption to the natural order of things. Instead we should view them as a part of a natural order of things.

You can find this change in mindset really helpful. When something goes wrong, don’t waste energy thinking “Why did it go wrong? Why is life so unfair?” Now, the severity of the bad thing may lead us down this path. But if we see obstacles as occurring naturally anyway, learning to deal with them could result in emotional growth. How we control our instant unbridled reactions, and instead focus on dealing with them, is what gives us emotional growth and a base to lay future foundations on.

Instead of wallowing in anger or pity – or perhaps allow yourself some opportunity to feel this way -focus your energies on what you can do and how you can dig yourself out of a poor situation. Sometimes, a healthy mindset helps. When a person loses a job for example, it is easy to panic at how you will manage for the next few months without a job. The higher the stakes, the higher the panic. But focus your energies into thinking how you can work things out financially, and drawing up contingency plans. This is a way of teaching yourself not to panic whenever something “bad” or unexpected happens. And the next time something like this happens again, you will have had the positive experience to deal with it again, instead of reinforcing it with a mixture of panic, guilt and fear.

Our natural reactions are to panic and let bad things destroy us. But we can learn to turn adversity into action and let it define us, and build our character.

What is really important is to realise that we have a choice. We of course don’t choose the bad things that happen to us, but we have a choice in deciding how we will react and respond. That we can control. When bad circumstances happen, often the initial feeling of fear and panic is developed from a lack of control over the happenings. We all feel calm when we have a measure of control than if we had not. So work on establishing and creating some form of control over situations. Choose how you feel. Choose how you react.

Better to burn out than fade? Use experience to achieve balance

Sometimes in life we feel drained, when we have tried to do too much and it takes a toll not only on our physical being but also of our mental health. What can we do? it is a good idea to take a break, and the length of this break depends on how deep we are into this kind of negative thinking or perhaps even depression.

Why is a break good? And how long does it take before we come out of the other end of the tunnel?

Scientists refer to this break as taking time away to refocus, to reset our neural circuits. When we overthink situations or spend too much time exploring different avenues, our minds go into overdrive trying to think out various contingency situations for which only one is needed, but because we need speed and responsiveness we try to do everything so that when the time comes we do not have to spend precious time thinking. But the problem can be that we have invested so much time thinking out possible scenarios, that by the time we have to act on one, we have already exhausted ourselves and our energies.

The flip side of this is inaction. For some people this is the mode of choice – to others it looks like they have given up. But being resigned to circumstances and expecting life to shape itself out for you, so that you can drift along with the tide is a bit of irresponsibility, a sort of transference that borders on having given up.

What can we do then? The narrow road is finding a balance between the hyperactive mindset and the inactive mindset. It is not necessarily better to be burnt out than to fade away. In some situations it may be more self-preserving to fade away that to expend energy being burnt out. It all comes down to balance. Sometimes we need to find that balance between expending too much and too little energy for the things we need to do in our lives. And how does that balance come about? Experience.

Thoughts on Depression

If you know someone who’s depressed, please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather. Try to understand the blackness, lethargy, hopelessness, and loneliness they’re going through. Be there for them when they come through the other side. It’s hard to be a friend to someone who’s depressed, but it is one of the kindest, noblest, and best things you will ever do.

– Stephen Fry

 

Depression is one of the things that many people go through. I would even say many of us go through it, because I have, and I am sure that at some point in your life you will have had too.

And if you have not suffered from it before, perhaps it is hard to imagine what it would feel like. Sometimes you may even be dismissive of depression and its existence, you may – as I have been guilty of in the past – even think that sufferers are merely malingerers, unable to work and simply finding an excuse not to go to work or to get out of bed.

Depression is crippling. Those suffering may find that it gives life a somewhat negative filter. You look through it through a dark lens, and unfortunately when you are in that funk, it is very hard to get out of.

How does one lapse into depression? There are many reasons, but one of them is the result of going too hard, too long. Life has its various stresses, such as financial, family, work, and while at various points in life one of these stresses may surge and grow out of proportion in comparison to the others, and when you are under this stress and your attempts to initially fight it are rebuffed, then not only is it physically tiring, it is also mentally tiring as it sends your mind into overdrive, which tires you out, so eventually you may find that even though you may know what you need to do, you may actually lack the energy to do it, and the disconnect causes you depression, which becomes only sapping in itself.

Depression is something that must be worked through. It is a cycle of incremental gains, slow positivity, that helps one out of depression. And sometimes we find that the thing that has been causing us depression, is removed through time. For example, many men report depression in their thiries and forties, at at time when they have young children, when they experience life stresses of having to be the breadwinners while not being at home to see their child grow up, being away from home while wanting to be home, yet returning home only to have their spouses, tired from the stresses of looking after children, snap at them when they return. And they wonder why their wives suggested having children in the first place …? Do you know someone like that? This can easily cause someone to lapse into depression. But when children grow up, and these stresses are removed, the depression is lifted with time.

Perhaps it is worth considering the thought that depression is the disconnect of an overworked mind and a physically tired body. The mind has been going into overdrive and the body is tired, and the soul is unhappy because the body has no energy or mental will to do the things that need doing.

So whenever you encounter someone with depression, don’t offer advice. Don’t give them more mental triggers that tax their minds, and your advice, no matter how well-meaning, only drains their mental energy. Listen if your friend needs a listening ear, because in the course of talking through their troubles your friend may be relieved of them, and all the mental associations they spin off. You can help your friend mentally filter out the mental thoughts that cause depression. Help them do something physically active to work off the depression when they are ready.

To paraphrase Stephen Fry, if someone you know is feeling cold because it is snowing, you can’t help them by asking why it is snowing. Just huddle with them, keep them warm, until the snow passes. It is truly a noble thing that you can do.